She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
The air taste purple.
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