adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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