it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
