I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize