I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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