Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We're using joints as your birthday candles
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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