so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Randomize
