Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize