i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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