For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize