you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
