Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
