nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize