I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
