How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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