no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
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