just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I came so hard my ears popped.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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