she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I just found a bag of teeth...
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
