I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
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