Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
You can't special order awesome
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
