He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
