i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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