I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
