check it out our google latitudes are spooning
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
