When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
