omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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