so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
