I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
