woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
