i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize