If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
