Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
