I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Boobs are out for the taking
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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