If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
