didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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