broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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