Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
no, he came in my armpit
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize