"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
we should paint friendship bongs
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