is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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