This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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