You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize