You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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