I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
