I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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