Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
