am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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