I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
zippers are such a cool invention
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
