But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Swine flu. Run for my life!
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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