When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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