Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Hippo gnu deer
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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