Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
